On my recent trip to Maui, I decided to save some money (plane tickets were $1200) and bought economy tickets. Because of the last-minute nature of our trip, I could not purchase adjacent seats. We got on the plane and are excited for our trip. My excitement is tempered when I see a very large woman struggling to move down the aisleway. I pray that she is not my seat partner. She inches closer and closer. She then stops short of my seat. WHEW.
Large woman: Is this 20B?
Stranger in seat 19B: No, that is the seat behind me.
Me (in 20A): NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
The large woman struggles to move into my aisle but finally manages miraculously to fit in her seat. In my time of weakness and despair, I forget to put down the armrest between us. Her body is halfway into my seat, and I’m pressed against the window. The flight attendant brings her a seatbelt extender. Nope won’t do. The flight attendant goes back and brings ANOTHER seatbelt extender. Needless to say, this was a very long flight.
On my way back, I won the obese lottery again! But this time, when the large man came down the aisle, I quickly moved the armrest down between us. (Fool me once…) This man only needed one seatbelt extender. Putting down the armrest was like praying the levees would hold during Hurricane Katrina. No dice. The man’s fat engulfed the armrest and trespassed into my personal space. None of it really matter because I was still euphoric from my trip to Hawaii.
Morale(s) of the story:
1. Don’t be a cheapass. Buy business or first class seats ALWAYS.
2. Don’t be fat. You are making other people miserable.
Thoughts:
‘Cause I only used half of my seat, can I get a 50% refund on my plane ticket? Also did the airline charge the woman an excess baggage fee?
